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Artichoke Pythagorum

by Tyler Kamen

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1.
Introduction 01:38
Verse 1 Long ago, our tale began, The fortune of a soul within, A story far before the end, A riddle you can’t understand. Feelings that you’ve never known, To have a heart without a home, Wandered minds all here to roam The sounds of marveling play, And waiting upon the rain Are they. Verse 2 Hiding in the forest wood, The little gnomes of creaturehood, A simple life they’ve understood, To know what’s right and what is good. Then a day brought mystery, A vegetable they’ve never seen, An artichoke fit for a king, Would set the hungry all free, And waiting among the stage Are we.
2.
Stringbean 03:22
Verse 1 In the light, A treasure grows, Of yellow rice, And vegetables. Got to harvest the load, Got to harvest the load, Got to harvest the load tonight, Got a simple remedy to make you feel alright. Climb a tree, Pick a lime, Hit the tap, Collect the slime. It’s just a matter of time, It’s just a matter of time, It’s just a matter of time to waste, Add the bittersweet juice just for the taste. Chorus Cook that string bean two ways. Ya got to cook the string bean. Cook that string bean two ways. Verse 2 Where you going? Where you been? The tree is growing, A magic bean. Such a mystical find, Such a mystical find, Such a mystical thing to find, Better break bread and pour the wine. Chorus Cook that string bean two ways. Ya got to cook the string bean. Cook that string bean two ways. STRINGBEAN! Verse 3 Collard greens, At no expense, Split the peas Of difference. Pawn to rook, It’s what the player took. It’s what the player took for the win, And now we’re waiting for dinner time to begin. Chorus Cook that string bean two ways. Ya got to cook the string bean. Cook that string bean two ways.
3.
Gnome Village, Welcome to the Gnome Village. Its such a lovely place to live. Here at the Gnome Village. Gnome Village, Welcome to the Gnome Village. We make veggie sausages, Here at the Gnome Village. Wrap up em, Take em down. That’s what the royal king ordered. Make it a spicy link for today. Veggie sausages! Is it hot? Is it not? Is it full of nuts and fruits Tied up in a bad way? Hark, the herald angels sing, Glory to the brave gnome king! Here, at the Gnome Village, There’s a secret ingredient, There’s a secret ingredient. Here, at the Gnome Village, Gotta add to experiment, Gotta add to experiment, Here, at the Gnome Village, There’s a secret ingredient, There’s a secret ingredient. Here, at the Gnome Village, Toss an apple, sprinkle mint, Toss an apple, sprinkle mint, Here, at the Gnome Village, There’s a secret ingredient, There’s a secret ingredient. Here, at the Gnome Village, Can you guess what it isn’t? Can you guess what it isn’t? Is it a pumpkin, Cause I’m afraid that It looks like a pumpkin. I could be wrong, But I’m pretty sure. That it looks like a pumpkin. Hark, the herald angels sing, Glory to the brave gnome king!
4.
Pumpkin soup in the ladle of truth Got to sip down. (And its sweeter to taste it) Gnome Village, Welcome to the Gnome Village. Its such a lovely place to live. Here at the Gnome Village. Gnome Village, Welcome to the Gnome Village. The pumpkin soup is going to give, Here at the Gnome Village. Wrap up em, Take em down. That’s what the royal king ordered. Make it a spicy link for today. Veggie sausages! Is it hot? Is it not? Is it full of nuts and fruits Tied up in a bad way? Hark, the herald angels sing, Glory to the brave gnome king!
5.
Dirt Bugs 01:07
Breaking news! BUGS! BUGS ON THE CROPS! An infestation of Dirt Bugs has eaten the gnome villages crops. But in good fortune, an anonymous source has informed us of a strange new vegetable on the outskirts of the forest. The king has sent a search party to find and bring back this strange vegetable. Will our travelers return? This is Elmer McGillicutty signing off!
6.
7.
Verse 1 When the autumn’s gone and dead, Will you drink the magic potion? A lettuce leaf, a cabbage head, The juice of nectar’s own devotion. Chorus Vegetable, Vegetable bandits. Verse 2 Won’t you steal away the dawn And bring us back the good ol’ fortune? Pulled up from the dregs along The rotting peels of disproportion. Chorus Vegetable, Vegetable bandits.
8.
Verse 1 Zezop McGregor resides, On the mountain where the eagle flies to. Dug out a cavern to hide, Never leaves, he’s afraid of what he’ll find. Pre-Chorus You’re not a prophet, but We’ll profit from your hallowed name. Ms. Mary Muffet, with her tuffet Wouldn’t rhyme quite the same. Chorus Wouldn’t want to harm you, Wouldn’t want to scare you Don’t be gone. Wouldn’t want to harm you, Wouldn’t want to scare you now. Verse 1 Zezop was petrified, Little gnomes discovered his catacombs. Then off, he took to fly, McGregor fled with a frightful tear in his eye. Pre-Chorus Zezop McGregor, We all come here with peace and love. We need your help to soar beyond The ruby sky up above. Chorus Wouldn’t want to harm you, Wouldn’t want to scare you Don’t be gone. Wouldn’t want to harm you, Wouldn’t want to scare you now. Bridge Then upon his return, Zezop slid his tongue cross his fangs and whispered, “The more you take, The more you leave behind. What am I”? Question, What is the answer to the question? Of the riddles you ask me, Do I know the answer? All the wonders I ponder Can be found in the question. Chorus Wouldn’t want to harm you, Wouldn’t want to scare you Don’t be gone. Wouldn’t want to harm you, Wouldn’t want to scare you now.
9.
The Island 03:46
Silk, green fabric flowing in the light, Will you please whisper by my head And tell me secrets that I cannot understand? Please tell me secrets that I cannot understand. Will you please take me by the hand And guide me from the island?
10.
Ah, the scent of Spring brings wonder to the senses. This artichoke is getting heavy and heavier. The heavy artichoke. (This place is haunted, Look what I found. It’s a rock.) Home, home we shall go. Through the bold and the brash, And the brush and the trees, in the fire mist. This artichoke better be delicious. This way out.
11.
12.
Bacchanalia 05:29
Verse 1 Here, there, everywhere, Small plants grow all long the outside. Chorus Bacchanalia! Verse 2 All hearts, growing minds, Come out now, the artichoke is inside. Chorus Bacchanalia! Hope springs, eternal we will. Poem Darkness falls the wandering wood, The lurking sprite removes its hood. A porcupine in porous tongue Speaks all in riddles and wiggles his thumb. Please take a seat, its not too late Here comes the waiter with your plate. All gathered here, the gnomes as one, Behold, the Artichoke Pythagorum. The Toast Excuse me…excuse me! I’d like to make a toast! To the gnomes For finding the artichoke and bringing it back for us to eat upon the solstice. The most important part of the artichoke Is the energy within. The energy within grants eternal life! So eat, eat as one! Chorus Bacchanalia! Hope springs, eternal we will.
13.
Conclusion 01:35
Here is where the story ends, A clever twist will make amends, The final score, another stroke, The gnomes devoured artichoke. Keeping with a common theme, Explain the thoughts inside of me, To you, who hears the beating drum, Calling out to speak And waiting for the rain…

about

A psychedelic prog rock adventure about a village of vegetable gnomes. Their garden is ravaged by dirt bugs, so they must seek out a mysterious artichoke at the edge of the forest to feast upon the solstice.

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released April 22, 2022

Written, performed and produced by Tyler Kamen

(c) Kamen Entertainment Group, Inc.

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Tyler Kamen New York, New York

Tyler Kamen is a guitarist, singer, song writer, and music producer from New York, NY.

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